| “ | ME-ARRGH! | „ |
| ~ Pirate Cat Captain |
The Pirate Cats were a group of pirates from the American Dad! episode, "Stan's Best Friend".
The Pirate cats crushed Steve's new puppy Kisses with their hot air balloon. Stan and Steve was playing Frisbee with Kisses when Stan threw the frisbee toward the street. Just when it looked like a car was going to run over Kisses, he jumped high enough to avoid the car and catch the frisbee. But after that, he was crushed under the Pirate cats' hot air balloon and was left in critical condition, leaving no other reasonable choice but to pull the plug, which Stan refused to do. He tried to find some research in the library on how to save Kisses and found a flyer of Dr. Lizzy, a veterinarian who seemed like she can save any animal. By the time the family decided to pull the plug on Kisses, Stan took him from the animal hospital and drove him to Kentucky to Dr. Lizzy's house. She "saved" Kisses, but he became horribly deformed. He was hooked up to a car battery, the top of his head was replaced with a baseball mitt, and his eyes were removed and are now where his testicles used to be. Stan had a dream of his old dog Freddie in Heaven. He was riding a boat with him. Freddie told Stan that saving Kisses is not going to bring him back. If Kisses can't run and play, then what's the point? The next morning, Stan blew up Kisses with dynamite, sending him to Heaven with a bang.