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Paul the Dummy

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I'm your alter-ego. I tell YOU what to do. Now grab that radio over there - We will hack it!
~ Paul

Paul is a one-shot villain from ALF. He is a ventriloquist dummy who brainwashed ALF. In the end, he is thrown on the floor by ALF, then the next morning, shoved in the freezer next to the fish sticks, which is probably Melmacian heaven. Ironically, considering he is the main antagonist of his only debut.


Paul is a cruel, cunning, antisocial, standoffish, obnoxious, creepy, and selfish dummy.



  • "Hi Lynn! Pay no attention to the furry guy with his hand up my back!"
  • "!@#$%^&*()\/.,`~<>"


  • "I do..."
  • "Hello Dummy!"
  • "So does the roast beef! Heheheheheheh!"
  • "That's 'cause with me on your hands, you can't grab all the food!"
  • "Except for those Styrofoam thingies-you shoved them under the rug!"
  • "Ohh baby!"
  • "Alright, alright, I heard ya. It's showtime!"
  • "I'd like to start with my impression of ALF."
  • "Yeah, you, furbrain!"
  • As Alf; "Yo, Wilheim! You're gonna have one less mouth to feed-I ate your cat!"
  • "Good night. Impression number two-Someone who ate Kate's cooking. Bleaugh!"
  • "Block of Wood!"
  • "You're making a right turn?"
  • "Ah, don't blame me-they wouldn't know talent if it threw up on their bed."
  • "Ohh baby!"
  • "If you're looking for the roast beef, I set it free."
  • "Alf's're talking to me! Hehehheheheheheh!"
  • "Can't you pack any faster?"
  • "Because this place is an suburban sing-sing."
  • "Oh great, tell the whole world!"
  • "None of your business! Hahahahahahah!"
  • "Shut up & keep packing!"
  • "I'll tell them you're my pet sloth. Which isn't too far from the truth."
  • "I'm your alter-ego. I tell YOU what to do. Now grab that radio over there - We'll hack it!"
  • "Yeah, back off, or you'll be sucking splinters!"
  • "Why don't we replace the two of you with Ozzie & Harriet? At least Harriet can cook!"
  • "Come on, come on! I'll teach you how to smoke! It's good for you! Oh yeah!"
  • "Hey! Gimme s'more nuts!"
  • "I do!"
  • "Good!"
  • "I think she likes me!"
  • "Look who showed up! You got a fat wad of nerve showing up...who's he?"
  • "Yeah, well tell him to beat it- I'm small enough as it is! Heheheheheheheh!"
  • "Well certainly not your suit- when they made that, there was only one Brooks brother."
  • "Speak for yourself!"
  • "Too many stupid rules-Don't eat the cat, don't break the dishes, don't eat the cat!"
  • "Oh wait, you haven't heard all the rules-don't throw food on the floor, don't eat food off the floor, don't bonk the guests."
  • "Great!"
  • "Still friends?!?"
  • "More nuts."
  • "Look who's here-the three stooges!"
  • "I was right- they are the three stooges!"
  • "No, don't do it-it's a trap!"
  • "You'll be SOR-RY!"
  • "Leave Kate's meatloaf outta this!"
  • "Yeah? Well you're a mama's alien!"
  • "I lied!"
  • "Oh, Yeah? Yeah?!?"
  • "Goodbye...dummy..."


  • Paul is named after Paul Fusco, the voice actor who played ALF's voice. But ALF got the idea of the name from the name being a use of racist profanity, to the point where the name ended up with him getting a beating until he needed 14 stitches!
  • Paul is very similar to the Batman villain Scarface since both are dummies & both take control of their ventriloquists.
  • Alf can play poker with Paul & have him cheat without noticing.

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