|“||How about these stupid letters from kids to Santa at the North Pole; "Dear Santa, Can you send me a bike and a slinky?" No! Your father's been laid off!||„|
|~ Myron Larabee|
He was portrayed by comedian Sinbad.
Myron first appears in the mall before it opens. He meets Howard Langston, a man who is trying to buy a toy called TurboMan for his son, Jamie. Upon meeting Myron, Howard learns he wants to buy a TurboMan too for his son. But the man gives a long speech about the conspiracy theory behind the Christmas market and nearly strangles a woman, while people stare at him, believing him to be crazy.
He then competes with Howard and later finds him in the public phone area, attempting to make a alliance with him but fails. They both head to another mall where a Christmas competition is held, in which the prize is a TurboMan doll. They both fail but Howard escapes and meets the Fake Santas. Howard comes across with him again in Mickey's Diner, and it is revealed Myron became a loser because his father never gave him the Christmas gift he wanted.
They both go to a radio station where another contest is held, with a TurboMan toy as prize again. Myron uses a mail bomb to threaten the DJ into giving him the TurboMan doll, but it turns out that the studio only has a gift certificate, not an actual doll. He then takes and throws another box, which turns out to be a real bomb, which blows up and leaves the policemen covered in smoke.
Later on in the christmas parade while Howard is disguised as TurboMan in the Turbo Man parade about to give the TurboMan doll prize to Jamie, Myron kidnapps the Dementor actor and dresses as him, to get the TurboMan doll prize of the parade. He chases Howard's son and successfully gets the toy while both of them are hanging from a wire Christmas tree, but a hit from Howard's "Turbo-rang", disguised as TurboMan, knocks him down.
He falls on a giant gift box, only to be surrounded by several police members, who get arrest and take the turboman doll. However, touched by how devoted he is to his own son, Jamie gives him the doll and they reconcile.
However Jamie, hearing that Myron was just to devoted to his son as Howard was to him, give Myron the doll revealing that he has the real TurboMan at home.
Myron's fate is never specified. It is likely that no charges were filed against him, and he gave his son the TurboMan on Christmas Morning.