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Gail Andrews

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This scum Gail Andrews
is driving Cruella insane!
So sayeth the great Lord of Darkness Sauron:
or he will send Darth Vader to terminate you.
I had nothing to do with the bombing of Damascus
~ Gail Andrews lies about her work to protect herself

Gail Andrews is a secondary antagonist in Mostly Harmless, the fifth book in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series.


Gail Andrews comes from another universe where the Earth wasn't blown up by Vogons and she comes from the United States of America in the 1980s and was president Hudson's advisor and through her manipulation she became his eventual girlfriend and lover. She did love him but she only cared about herself and her money and beauty. Eventually there was a war with the Middle East and Gail feared for her safety so she convinced Hudson the city of Damascus was hoarding massive nuclear warheads and she decided to protect herself by telling Hudson to blow up Damascus, which happened.


Gail Andrews got into astronomy and astrology, perhaps annoyed that the stars were more beautiful than her, and her greed got into confirming astrology as a science rather than a superstition. She wrote a book on the subject, named You and Your Planets. Gail got more fame from this. Also, a tenth planet in the Solar System was discovered and named planet Rupert after an astronomer's pet parrot. Gail gave lectures about how the new planet would impact people's lives in astronomy. She also met Tricia MacMillian, who hadn't left with Zaphod Beeblebrox in this universe. Gail met Tricia several times and eventually met her for drinks at Tricia's hotel and gave her the astrology book.

Gail Andrews was eager to push Tricia off the limelight and get herself back in and told her to leave and go back to London whilst Gail relished in fame and money in New York.

Gail was also inardverdantly responsible for the destruction of planet Earth; Tricia gave You and Your Planets to the Grebulon race; and the Grebulon Leader used this information from the book to confirm to the Vogon Leader that he could blow up Earth. Although Ford Prefect, Arthur and Tricia were revealed later to have survived and been teleported to the Milliways restaurant, Gail was unable to protect herself and she perished in the destruction of Earth when all her precious skin was melted from her body.

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