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“
SEE YOU LATER, ALLIGATOR, AFTER A WHILE, CROCODILE, DON'T FORGET TO WRITE.
„
~ Blaine's catchphrase.
Blaine the Mono is a supporting antagonist in The Wastelands and Wizard and Glass in Stephen King's The Dark Tower series. He was a pink train (monorail). He was alone so long that it drove him mad, and he even killed his counterpart, Patricia the Mono, because she complained too much. He was planning on killing himself before reaching Topeka and then decided to bring Roland and his ka-tet with him.
Blaine was a monorail developed by the Old Ones, with dipolar computers housed under Lud. His original purpose was to house passengers to Topeka, making stops in Candleton, Rilea, The Falls of the Hounds, and Dasherville. His top speed was 900 miles an hour. Even though he existed in Mid-World he still knew information on the Americas.
He assisted in the death of Patricia, a fellow sentient train, by removing part of her programming. During his slope into insanity, Blaine developed a rogue part of his brain that was dubbed "Little Blaine". Little Blaine was fearful of the much more dominant "Big Blaine" and wanted to stop him, but couldn't. Owing to the sometimes mundane, sometimes mystic flow of information between the worlds of The Dark Tower series, a children's book existed on the worlds of Eddie, Susannah and Jake called 'Charlie The Choo-Choo', and both Susannah and Eddie recalled it from their childhoods. The book involved the title train, sentient as Blaine was, and its desire to 'be a happy choo-choo' until the day he died. In illustrations from the book (shown in higher-end editions of DT novels), the children riding aboard Charlie seem scared instead of happy. Roland noted several portents in the book on several levels, but for then and there shrugged them off as something they would have to keep in mind but act on when the time was right. Somehow, the fanciful story retold the life of Blaine The Mono, though whether this was information the author received through dreams or visions, or if she was a traveler from a world where Blaine existed, is never made clear. The title contains the series' signature 19 letters and was written (or listed as being written by Claudia Bachman, wife of author Richard Bachman, a one-time pseudonym for Stephen King himself. The chills the book gave the ka-tet would prove worth it, preparing them in a broad way to deal with Blaine.
The Waste Lands[]
Eddie and Susannah found Blaine resting in The Cradle of Lud. When Roland, Jake, and Oy reunited with Eddie and Susannah, Blaine had already started releasing nerve gas in Lud. Before the group could board Blaine, they had to solve a riddle, which Susannah did before the gas reached them. While on Blaine, he informed them that he was planning suicide by crashing into the Topeka station, with the ka-tet on him. Roland asked Blaine to spare them if they could give him a riddle that he could never solve.
Wizard and Glass[]
Blaine answers every riddle the group can give him, without pausing. He knows the answer to every riddle. It is only through Eddie's goofy riddles - the ones Roland deemed "unworthy" - that the group was saved. In an attempt to "dumb down" his intelligence to levels capable of answering Eddie's jokes, Blaine fried his circuits, thus dying. His body continued to move towards Topeka. He crashes there, but luckily his speed decreased enough that the ka-tet only sustained minor injuries.
Quotes[]
“
IN THE HALLS THE PEOPLE COME AND GO, BUT I DON'T THINK ANY OF THE ARE TALKING OF MICHELANGELO
„
~ Blaine while the city of Lud is thrown into chaos.
“
ASK ME A RIDDLE
„
~ Blaine to the ka-tet
“
YOU FELLOWS WANT TO REMEMBER THAT NOBODY LOVES A SMARTASS
„
~ Blaine after Jake tells him that the answers to the riddle book Riddle-de-Dum! are in his head.